Female Logistics

I've decided that men can suvive without a female figure to organize them. The confusion happens because we can't decode the woman's intricate filing process. For instance, I would be able to find that shirt I was looking for if I had put it away. The reason I ask my wife where it is everytime is because she's the one with the "system".

New Products

Seen on a gas station reader board:
"New Vitamin Water Flavor Pringles 75c"
Mmmm... Sounds good.

Ironic happenings: A tow truck

Ironic happenings:
A tow truck breaking down on the side of the road

Home Sweet Home

Nothing says welcome home like man's best friend. Back in Toledo, in the cold... Yea! [/sarcasm]

On The Plane Leaving New Mexico

Don't worry, we'll be back.

Should I Be Worried?

As we are pulling away from the gate at the Albuquerque Airport. This is the picture that came out like an ominous warning that we shouldn't be leaving... Odd.

Driving Dilemma

Driving for hours through the desert and I have to pee so bad.

The Continental Divide

So how can they really tell the exact spot where the country is divided?

Two Alarm Fires

Have you ever had to dump so bad you felt like puking? Yeah, it was weird.

Irrelevant

Do you remember going to the movies without commercials before the previews. For me, I was in London watching Jurassic Park III when I saw pre-movie commercials.

Movements

I'm not sure if it was diet, exercise or what, but in high school I might have pooped maybe 3 times a week. Now it seems like 1-2 times a day...

If I Were A Vampire

Instead of ruthlessly killing people for blood or fighting evil at night, I would probably walk around in pajama pants eating leftover pizza and drinking generic root beer straight from the 2 Liter.

Germaphobia

I always put toilet paper down on the seat in public restrooms if I have to dump. I'm sure that the flimsy one-ply t.p. will protect me from the random assortment of germs on the toilet seat.

Sadistic Bear

So there's something disturbing about seeing a stuffed bear turning a handle that mixes up bear stuffing. Its like a cannibalistic bear meat-grinder.

Some Kids Never Grow Up

I guess the flashing lights and moving objects are stimulating. That's best man in my wedding folks... nice choice on my part I guess

I guess I never realized

I guess I never realized how attached to the internet I am. The servers have been down at work all day so I feel disconnected from the world...

After Watching the ESPYs

I have decided that Danica Patrick is pretty hot.

Inventors Who Should Be Shot

On my list of inventors who should be shot: the guy who invented "Heelys"

Honestly Now

Who can honestly say that they would pay .65¢ for a Clark bar... I'm not sure I've ever witnessed someone saying "boy I wish I had a Clark bar right now"

You Might Be A Redneck...

If you spray-paint your Dodge Neon camouflage colors and add a cheesy-looking light bar, you might be a redneck

Scratch that, you are definitely a redneck